NightTime Evacuation

I have come to realize that one of my favorite times of day is when I seem to wake up around 2-3am. I think it has been habit since Disney was a baby and that was when she usually woke up before she slept through the night. I love stepping outside and hearing the solitude of the neighborhood. The only thing you here are whatever bugs and frogs are around the swamp behind my house. It’s nice. Normally there are tons of kids out there all day.. loud kids. Probably like i was.

I use this time to go right the edge of the woods and pee in to them. Makes me feel free. I also think i like the exhibitionist part of it. At any given time a neighbor could come outside and see me standing there all free and loose. I always wonder what I would do if they did see me. Hopefully I never find out.

I did get some rather good news from my mom. She is staying put where she is with a job and all… and Esther is relatively over the cancer part of her thyroid treamt… now its the recovery after the removal. Paxton and Disney’s baby sister should come any day soon. I can feel it. Yesterday michelle went through a lot of contractions, odd intervals but nonetheless contractions. It was a long day too… we are nevous. Disney came so fast that we don’t want to dick around at home and be late, but then Paxton came so slow..we are excited.

Slow Going

I am not good at remembering to do things on a repeated basis. I enjoyed writing my two or three first posts. But here I am days later finally writing a new one. I would love to say that I am overwhelmed (not really am though) or that my computer broke (nah…). I just don’t.

My goal this summer is to move. 75% chance I move to Michigan. I already have a few thousand set aside for the trip. We are just waiting for the newest baby to arrive. I hope when i get to Michigan (if thats where I go) that my mom and sisters will still be there (I am sure they will). Part of my move is being based on having family with in drivig distance. Even if its like 2 hours away.

With all that is going on, the only thing that bothers me is the name of my daughter. I have kicked around Camden, Campbell, and Faris or Ferris. I am still thinking as is Michelle.  We’ll see.. I got time.

A Look Back

I looked back at what I wrote about Carlton. I realized I got just as mad about the situation as I wrote. Its creepy how a feeling, good or bad, can come back as strong just when we you go back through the memories of that time.

 A lot of kids come into my store, some with and without parents. I am amazed more and more each day at the general amount of disrespect that is shown by most of these kids. I know the store is located in a less then desirable part of town, but i won’t use that as an excuse.

I’m not sure If i was that disrespectful at that same age. I am sure I wasn’t. I am pretty sure that both of my parents showed me that to get respect you have to give it first. I preach that now to my oldest child who seems to be on this same path as some of the others he age. She doesn’t have it as large as they do, but its there. I got her progress report back from school for her third trimester and as usual her grades reflect her effort. He effort is practically non existent… so you get an idea of her grades. The one thing that bothered me was that one of the teacher’s comment about paxton was disrespectful.

 I was more upset with that than anything else on that paper. It drove me nuts. That’s what got me mad about Carlton’s situation as well… disrespect. 

Carlton

There is a kid who comes into my store everyday, a few times on weekends. His name is Carlton. He comes from a single mother household and the mother works hard to keep his education going. He is mentally retarded in someway or form and she works to send him to a special school. Because his mom does this she is hardl home and has paid the YMCA for a membership that he can use freely anytime of day.

One day he came and told me he is entering into a basketball tournament at the “Y” and that I should come watch him. I managed to get out of work to attend his game (he lost without a problem). What I witnessed shocked me. In a world where color barriers are almost rarely brought up, and homosexual lifestyles and interracial lifestyles are becoming more normal… kids still don’t see past your mental ability. Carlton was shoved, kicked, and even punched in the back of the head for being the way he is. I gave Carlton a moment to react and gave those around who knew him longer to defend him. None did and he took it. I was pissed. At the end of the game a group of kids surronded him to make more fun of him, and tried to steal his ball and steal his lunch money his mom left for him. My level of frustration was to the max.

I stood up and yelled across the gym using foul language (no swear words.. just loud mean words) at the kids to back off. In shock they all stood and watched me as I hauled ass to where they were. When I grabbed carlton and started to walk him back to my side of the gym a kid(i say kid because of his obvious immaturity, he is 23) threw his water bottle at me. It missed but it was enough to set me off. I turned and got back in his face. I have learned any bully is only one til you step up to the plate. He faked a punch towards my face and I lunged my open hand to his neck and grabbed right around his adams apple and started to squeeze. He panicked that i was actually going to hurt him, I got my sensed back and shoved him to the floor. I stood over him and with my finger in his face, and a mean scowl that only a parent can make, and told him if he ever does anything again to carlton I would see to it mysef that he would have both of his legs broken.

 Carlton come in everyday and gives me a hug and shakes my hand. I have found myself being very big brotherly to him. I have gotten him to take showers on a daily basis. Hs teeth brushing is up in the air sometimes. I bought him a deodarant which I can smell on him everyday now. He got a date to the prom, and brought her down to see me. Carlton’s mom thanked me in person, and then asked me if it was okay if crlton tried to kiss his prom date after the dance. I took carlton aside and told him to only kiss hr if his teeth were brushed and handed him some gum. I have since visited the “y” and asked around to see if there was more incedents. There hasn’t been one since. 

BEEP HELLO

Today is Disney’s so called birthday. She is 20 months old. I haven’t felt this much love coming from one being as i get from her everyday.

At work our entry door makes a beeping when it gets opened. Right before that you can here the whoosh of the air as it passes in between the store and the freedom outside. Usually as it opens the air is briefly refreshed and garbage sputters in along the floor. The evidence of spring is coming to an end as the flower blossoms of trees start to fall and raid the floor of the store. The wind always seems to be going in my neck of the woods. I think its because I work in the northern most part of the applachians (sp?).

 Have you ever watched animal planet where animals are trained to respond to noises and colors or whatever stimuli the “scientists” dream up next? Or how about in “Lost” when Sawyer tries to get the fish biscuit? Noise stimuli is amazing. Thank God we can hear. Most people wouldn’t know when to cheer for a scored goal in hockey without the siren, siren goes, the fan goes nuts. Then and only then do most see the replay on the screen to confirm what they heard.

Then this morning I was watching my daughter. She loves when we sit next to each other and call out what we are seeing on TV. She is getting so smart, and TV is smarter than it ever has been. People don’t have to rely on just Sesame Street anymore.  Disney channel’s morning programs are all aimed at learning, and so are nickelodeons. But I noticed the noise stimuli once more. When the Wiggles come on, even without seeing them, all she needs is the first seconds of their theme song. She’ll run from where ever she is and she starts to dance mindlessly and helps calls out the names of the wiggles.

Even as parents we respond. Baby cries and we jump up from sleep instantly. Police siren and we instantly pull over. Beep from the door and all my employees all make a move to the door to say hello to whoever enters my world in the store. BEEP… HELLO.